Three of my favourite sexy quotes:
A Graze on my lips: and if those hills be dry, stray lower, where the pleasant fountains lie. William Shakespeare
A man is two people, himself and his cock. A man always takes his friend to the party. Of the two, the friend is the nicer, being more able to show his feelings.
When my Mum found my diaphragm I told her it was a bathing cap for my cat.