It’s hot, damn hot!

images.jpgAn Aussie version of Jingle Bells for all my American friends. Yes, we do get a wee bit sick of all the ditties about snow! It’s going to be 38 degrees (that’s 100.4 fahrenheit) here on Christmas day!

Dashing through the bush
In a rusty Holden Ute
Kicking up the dust
Esky in the boot
Kelpie by my side
Singing Christmas songs
It’s summer time and I am in
My singlet, shorts & thongs!

Oh, Jingle bells, Jingle bells
Jingle all the way

Christmas in Australia
on a scorching summer’s d
Jingle bells, Jingle bells
Christmas time is beaut

Oh what fun it is to ride
in a rusty holden ute!




Filed under Humour

15 responses to “It’s hot, damn hot!

  1. I hate to divulge my ignorance, but… are you going to post an American translation for those of us not fluent in Aussie?


  2. Hi Karrie – sorry! Ok, please excuse me if I over-explain things!
    Bush = The Outback – anywhere that isn’t in a town.
    Ute = Favourite Aussie male mode of transport – a pickup truck/utility.
    Esky = Large insulated food/drink container for barbecues etc.
    Kelpie = Australian sheepdog originally bred from Scottish collie.
    Thongs = Cheap rubber backless sandals.
    Beaut = Beauty, great, fantastic.


  3. poseidonsmuse

    Phew! Thanks Karrie…Being a Canadian and a bit deprived of Aussie-isms, I thank you for that…(although, I knew the definition for everything but Ute, Esky and Kelpie…). Aye Carumba!

    Simonne, that was utterly HILARIOUS!!! Woot! Glad that we are going to have snow for the Holidays in my area though…Now…One other question…Did you make that up yourself? Very clever!

    A more childish (Canadian version) of Jingle Bells goes this way…

    “Jingle bells
    Batman smells
    Robin laid an egg
    Batman took a 22
    and shot him in the leg
    Hey [repeat chorus]”

    Ah, yes, the Hillybilly Deluxe version of an old favourite….Where comic book heroes and hunting weapons don’t (or at least shouldn’t) mix!


  4. Hi Simonne, the jingle is a riot. Now I don’t know what our temperature will be here on Christmas day. But I do know I would take -25 any day over +100, yikes that is just to hot.


  5. Hey Muse, no I didn’t make that up, it’s been around for years I think. I have no idea who wrote it, all of the examples I found didn’t attribute an author – maybe they didn’t want to lay claim to such brilliance??
    I have heard that Batman version – a literary masterpiece, no? πŸ˜‰
    Hi Bill, yes that is rather hot, even for us! But we’re well equipped with air conditioning, swimming pools and eskies!! πŸ˜‰


  6. Grace


    Even though we have rain right now, I do remember a few Christmases spent sweating my butt off because I was trying to do all the traditional holiday ‘baking’ and ‘cooking’ in 90 degree weather! We Californians share alot with you Aussies only, it’s WINTER here!

    FA LA la la laaaaaaaa lala la laaaaaaaaa

    πŸ˜‰ xoxox


  7. Grace, your xmas mood is contagious! … FA LA la la laaaaaaaa lala la LAAAAAAA! πŸ™‚


  8. LOL Simmone, that was fantastic! I would have believed that you wrote it if you’d said so.

    Now I don’t have to come up with a Jingle Bells parody – phew! That’s a relief.

    Gracie is right, there have been many a Christmas in southern California in shorts and sundresses. And cooking in that weather is tough.

    Though this year, I think it will be a chill winter for us – a mere 68 degrees according to the weather man. πŸ˜‰


  9. Doktor Holocaust

    yes, laugh and gloat now, but in six months when it’s the Southern Hemisphere’s turn for a little Nightmare Before Midwinter (or X-mess, Yuletide, Brumalia, etc), those of us north of the equator will be having our Midsummer Night dreams.

    and to my credit, I figured out all the slang on my own except Ute, which I figured was a type of vehicle, but I thought it was an Aussie car company like Ford or Toyota or whatever rather than a style of vehicle.

    were I not already fed up with the holiday from having the secular American version of it shoved down my throat since mid-october, I’d do a Nadsat rendition of some yuletide tune, but i am lazy and fed up with the holiday.


  10. Hey Annie, yes I thought I’d some of the heat off you seeing I was so demanding!!

    Of course you figured it out Doc, you’re the one with the huge brains! πŸ™‚ MERRY Christmas!


  11. romi41

    I wonder if Santa wears swim shorts and a pair of thongs when he swings by your fair country…well really, I don’t want to picture that, so forget it…lol..

    He should though really…


  12. Paul B.

    How could I have forgotten my first Holden..?! Rusty it certainly was… and the first car I ever had.

    Plenty of room for me and the surfboard for a little Christmas wave action..


  13. CJ

    just for you – of course he does! See here:


  14. CJ

    Ah bugger! Didn’t include the image. Oh well, see here:

    merry christmas!


  15. romi41

    Ohhh CJ….no, no no….

    That was SO wrong, and not just because of the tank-top, nor because of the leg-exposure, but mostly because he was wearing…those…effin’….”CROC shoes”!!!!

    GAHHH….I’m vomiting in my own mouth, and believe me I didn’t have dessert, so it ain’t pretty… 😦

    Oh by the way, my vomit-reaction to Crocs is based on a deep-seated hatred for the shoes, which I wrote about some time ago….


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